How I thought it was my year

Mother says that when you start the year through prayers, there are chances the entire 365 days will be chill.

As you may all know, this year will not be with us come Tuesday. It is a year that promised way too much at the beginning; New Year, new me and all that resolution thing was in high gear.

For the past three years, my mother trained me well. She says when you start the year through prayers, there are chances the entire 365 days will be chill.

And so I have listened to her, even if the new year finds me in a totally atheist country, I will look for a place that

housed a church before they were completely atheist and I will find a way of starting a prayer before the count down.
After the fireworks, I tend to slide back to my regular programming, missing church and praying through mobile applications.
Last year, I was at it again last year, ditching all my new year plans to be at this overnight service conducted by a man of God. I had heard many things about the man and much as I rarely buy the talk, it was New Year’s eve and thus there was no way I would accept the year jetting in with me getting wasted.

So I made it to this overnight, that night, I closed my eyes a number of times and many of those times I was muttering to myself. In fact, I did not say a word, I let my inner voice do the talking – growing up, my stupid self-thought the inner voice was that of God, until it motivated me to grab sweets from a vendor while in a taxi.

This night my inner voice had a lot to discuss with the big man, it was just a week after I had been through those annual question and answer sessions of ‘when are you getting married’ to ‘when are you getting a real job’.

See I come from a place where it is not yet a job if it is not a contract with health insurance, a self-contained office space and more than 20 leave days and me having dreadlocks, my hustle becomes harder to sell, many think it’s just a hobby.
So even before I had set off to that overnight, I had already had those prayers with my mum laying her hands on my head, she prayed that I could get a ‘proper’ job and of course wished me a holy marriage.

How I almost believed all this was going to pass!

During prayers, that prophet had made some prophesies that clearly fit my profile and went on to say that 2018 was the year I would get a new car, much as I have never owned one, I believed the choice of words was to confuse my enemies.

He said some things I was not ready for like wedding, a new house, I did not know if as a boy child I had to embezzle to achieve all these things in a year, but since the first description had fit my profile, like the rest I gave an Amen on steroids.

As we are coming to the end, I run this column and I don’t even own an old car; how I thought I had the year covered! This time round, I will be in church, but of course am not accepting any profiling and I am not making any resolutions, I choose to make things happen.